The first pictures have been captured of Zachary Quinto, who plays a young Mister Spock for the new Star Trek film, in full costume. (Thanks to JFX.com, who also took it upon themselves to splash their ugly-ass logo all over the shots.)

I can’t believe I’m saying it, but he actually looks like he’ll make a pretty damn good Spock. But looks aren’t everything–in fact, they’re pretty much the least important part of playing a role. But at least seeing the effort and success they’ve taken in making this kid look like a believable Spock is mildly encouraging.

(Note: for those of you who aren’t complete nerdwads, Zachary Quinto is the same fella who plays the bad guy Sylar in the popular Heroes series.)

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I thought the news about Johnny Depp in Dark Shadows was bad…

According to Variety, there is to be a remake of The Day the Earth Stood Still and the role of Klaatu will be played by none other than Keanu Reeves. Yes. That Keanu Reeves.

This is the worst thing I’ve ever heard. The Day the Earth Stood Still is in my mind the greatest science fiction movie to have ever been made. It has held up tremendously in the fifty plus years since its release; everything about it is still perfect. It needs a remake less than any other sci-fi picture from that era (that is to say, it doesn’t need one at all). And its message is in no need of updating. The Cold War may be over, but the “Hey, Earthlings, maybe you should stop killing each other always?” message comes through loud and clear just the same, and is still relevant the way it was presented.

But I suppose every movie that exists is eventually going to be remade by the creatively dead people in Hollywood. But must they use Keanu Reeves? The man who is, without a doubt, the single worst actor in history? And get this: The Variety article says the film “returns [Reeves] to his strong suit in the sci-fi realm.” His strong suit?!! He has no strong suit! He has only weakness and bullcrap.

This is the most depressing news I’ve ever heard.

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Rating:
Holy freaking jesus is this a turd. My memory of it from childhood was that it was pretty awesome, but I attribute that to my youthful obsession with all things vampiratic and my inability to accept, at that tender young age, that something featuring Count Fucking Dracula could suck so much ass. But it does. Imagine the largest, dirtiest ass you’ve ever had the displeasure to know, and that is what this movie sucks. It sucks that much ass, I tells ya. And it sucks it with joy and relish. The happiness kind of relish and the pickle kind.

I hate this movie so much I don’t even know where to begin.

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My compatriot here at Melted Reel reminded me recently that, as a writer, you must learn to “kill your darlings.”

Meaning, there are aspects of a creation which you love the most, and which you have undoubtedly spent the most time and effort on — and you must sacrifice some of their individual luster in order to benefit the whole. The time you’ve spent on them likely means that they’re overwrought and distracting.

The very same advice could have (and should have) been given to Rob Zombie, the writer/director of this year’s remake of “Halloween.”

The first act of this updated classic is clearly where Zombie saw the opportunity to leave his unique imprint on a classic story. And imprint it, he certainly does. The problem is, the rest of the film is such a well done and dedicated homage to the original, the unique flavor of the inserted back story is nothing more than a distraction, detracting from the film as a whole.

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