We all know that Paul McCartney actually died in a car accident in the mid-sixties and was replaced by a lookalike. Since the Beatles didn’t want anyone to know the shocking truth, they craftily embedded clues in the lyrics of every song they recorded, put visual hints on all their album covers, and even set up a hotline you could call to get a secret message. Because that is exactly what people do when they are deliberately trying to keep a huge secret.

But we true believers have always known what the Beatles were really covering up and then prompty uncovering but in a totally secret way, I swear. The cute Beatle was dead and in his place was an impostor. The only mystery left was just who the impostor was. Several possibilities have been thrown around over the years, including names like Billy Shears and William Campbell (presumably, not the same one who was in “The Trouble With Tribbles”), but no one has ever known the real truth.

Until now.

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