In the documentary that comes with the Jaws DVD, Steven Spielberg tells a story about the construction of the scene where the shark first pops out of the water. He wanted to first have the audience laughing, so they’d be totally off their guard when the scare came. Thus, Roy Scheider as Chief Brody delivers those immortal words:

“I can go slow ahead. Why don’t you come down here and chum some of this shit?”

Then, KAPOW, shark.

As Spielberg explains, in the more innocent cinematic times of the mid 1970s, saying “shit” was an easy laugh. Nowadays, alas, with our anything goes ways, shit doesn’t even make us crack a smile.

But I don’t think that’s quite true. Even today, shit’s an underused word. Sure, we say basically anything we want in movies now, but as a result we tend to go right for the Big Bad Word, blowing straight past Shit Towne in our headlong rush to Fuck City.

Take Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. That was almost ten years after Jaws. Now consider the scene near the end of the picture when Indy’s stuck on the middle of the rope bridge, high above (what else?) crocodile-infested waters. Bad guys are coming at him from all sides. His sword raised over his head, Indy looks left, looks right, assess the situation and says:

“Oh, shit.”

And it’s funny! If they’d ignored shit and gone straight for having Indy say “Oh, fuck,” that moment wouldn’t play as funny at all. Fuck would be too utterly bleak, making the situation seem absolutely hopeless and leaving our hero in despair. But shit makes us laugh.

Moving ahead, we come to Jurassic Park, and now we’re almost two full decades after Brody the cussin’ chum-chucker. And shit, the little word Steven Spielberg doesn’t believe audiences love, makes for the funniest line in the whole flick. Laura Dern, anxious to find out what’s ailing a sick triceratops, is working her way through great mounds of dinosaur spoor. Jeff Goldblum’s Dr. Malcolm, sizing up just such a mound, calmly remarks:

“That is one big pile of shit.”

It’s not a joke, really—it’s just a statement of fact. Laura Dern’s Dr. Sattler is, after all, up to her elbows in one big pile of shit. So it’s not a joke, but it’s funny anyway because shit, properly and carefully utilized, is still a wonderfull getter of cheap laughs.

So don’t give up on shit, Mr. Spielberg (and judging by many of the movies you’ve made since Jurassic Park, you haven’t*), and shit won’t give up on you.

*BA-ZING

If You Hated This, You Will Also Totally Hate:

• Pinky and the Brain: Still Awesome
• Let’s Talk About Jaws, Baby
• Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
• Poltergeist
• He’s Doing it Again!